It’s a past-faced world.
Every one is hustling and moving. I can’t even finish one article without starting ten more just so the ideas would not leave my head. My big, busy head. There’s a lot of things I want to write, and a hundred other things I had to do. Add motherhood to the mix, and I had a full brain buzzing with a thousand lists of to-do’s.
Then, I realized, maybe it was because of the way I was brought up by my parents. My mom, a teacher, always brings home her auto-timer for every tasks, just as how she does it at school.
“You have 20 minutes to answer this pop-quiz.”
“5 minutes to take notes before I erase it all down.”
“10 seconds to answer this question.”
“1 minute to pee.”
I didn’t find it stressful before, though. Instead, I learned how to move quicker multi-task. Applying make-up while sipping coffee; breakfast and checking email; social media and taking a shower.
But then, as I think about it, I don’t really do much of multi-tasking. I just do one part of the one thing in between of the other. Thus, it looks like it takes me longer time to finish one thing.
Worse, I don’t get to enjoy what I’m doing. Sometimes, I’m in the office, and I’d ask myself if I already had my coffee for the morning. I end up drinking as much as 5 cups a day.
As a mother, though, I prefer my child to know the value of quality time; that good products and new skills are produced and learned by spending effort and time. And also that it’s worthless if he doesn’t know how to appreciate and congratulate himself for these things.
I want my son to enjoy every little thing that he does. There is no better time than now that he’s growing up for both of us to realize the value of appreciation for both of us. The small things that he discovers about his little world now might have been the usual stuff for the us, but I try to remember that these are big deal for him. These are new.
Walking, playing with usual objects, getting dressed, taking a bath are the things that we usually overlooked as an adult. We pay little attention to them. But these are huge tasks for my son, and I should not expect him to move fast..
Usually, I’d blurt out the words : “Faster”, “Come here, quick.” “Finish that right now.”
I try to be mindful of that now. I try to avoid saying these, and be more patient and wait for him to finish on his own time.
If he’s hanging on to one task for a long time, I would instead blurt out other tasks for him so he’d get to choose if he wants to switch from one thing to another.
“Aren’t you hungry, yet, sweetie?”
“Do you want to go outside and play now?”
“Do you need help putting on your clothes so that you can your favorite show now?”
I know that it’s basic necessity for the kids to understand how time works, but it is also important for them to enjoy every little stuff as much as they could. That could help them be appreciative of time and effort that they’d exert for each tasks. I believe to be one of the keys for them to appreciate their self-worth. They’d realize how hard they had worked for small stuffs, and they’d know that they had finished it in their own time, being mindful on each development. They would bring that mindfulness until they grow old, understanding the world around them, discovering insects and holes and door knobs, and once they figure it out, they will celebrate their mini-victories. When they grow up, they wouldn’t deliver less. They would take time to finish a project and they would know how they should be treated after each work done.
Writing in braids,